Wednesday, May 29, 2019

EXTRA: Reality tops fantasy

It's the reason I find it incredulous anyone would ever consider writing fiction; I find that reality usually has a knack of coming up with even more outrageous things than even my addled imagination could ever concoct.
Take the Chicago White Sox employee who, on Wednesday, was called upon to do the "first pitch" duties. She wound up uncorking a wild throw so erratic that she hit a photographer who happened to be on the playing field at the time.
IT LOOKED ALMOST as ridiculous as the bit from the 1988 film "Bull Durham." Remember when actor Tim Robbins' "Nuke LaLoosh" character hit the bull mascot? And probably more memorable than either of the ballgames the White Sox actually managed to win Wednesday against the Kansas City Royals.

Of course, this first pitch attempt brings to mind the one time that Chicago Bulls basketball star Michael Jordan did the duties prior to a ballgame at Wrigley Field. Made worse by the fact that Jordan himself once tried playing professional baseball.
No wonder he never made it beyond the Birmingham Barons. He couldn't hit (only .202 batting average) or throw!
And now, this White Sox employee is being overly grateful for the fact that the ball club won't publicly identify her. Because you just know she'll make "blooper" videos for years to come, just like that moment when then-Texas Rangers outfielder Jose Canseco had a ball bounce off his noggin for a home run -- a more-memorable moment than any of the 462 home runs (16 of them during a brief stint he played for the White Sox) he clubbed with his bat.


No comments: