Is a drink while leering at the strip club as essential as a beer at the ballpark?

I still remember the last time I was in a strip club. Not in Chicago, but it was one of those places that didn’t have a liquor license and didn’t think much of the idea of people bringing their own liquor inside.

Does alcohol really make her attainable?

Hence, they served soft drinks. The group I was with (I seem to recall it was a bachelor party) guzzled down heavily iced (and I suspect watered-down) soda pop. It may well have been diet. It was definitely flat.

CERTAINLY NOT ANYTHING that would have provided the “manly” image we’d like to think we were projecting that night.

I actually do recall one of my colleagues making a public comment to complain about the lack of liquor on the premises.

However, we had engaged in other activities prior to entering the strip club, all of which involved alcoholic beverage consumption. Which is why when one of the strip club staff snapped back, “You guys look like you don’t need another drink,” we had to laugh.

It was true.

SOMEHOW, I CAN’T help but think that response to us is one that many strip club patrons in Chicago need to hear, particularly since city officials are; considering lightening up their opposition to liquor licenses being issued to businesses where the female staff expose their nipples to the public for show.

Some let you bring your own liquor, while others follow the lead of that strip club I was in all those years ago (seriously, once you’ve seen one, there really isn’t much point to making repeat appearances; it’s not like you’re allowed to “touch” the merchandise, unless you’re willing to risk the wrath of the bouncer).

Do you need beer to tolerate bobbled double plays?

Ninth Ward Alderman Anthony Beale says he’s willing to issue liquor licenses to such clubs because he thinks the potential for problems on the premises is worse if people bring their own liquor.

Who knows exactly what they’re bringing with them? And he says he’s aware of instances where people brought gallons of alcoholic beverages with them to consume while they leered (and ONLY leered) at the overly-tattooed ladies.

CHEAP HOOCH, AND easy women. Not a nice combination.

Whereas if you let the clubs sell drinks, they’re going to have to comply with the regulations that come with a liquor license. Plus, they’re going to be serving people watered-down drinks at ridiculously-absurd prices.

You may wind up paying more than the $9 or so that one has to cough up for a beer at the ballpark.

Which is another place where it seems some people think it is a part of the atmosphere to consume alcohol.

I HAVE TO wonder how many people managed to endure the capacity crowd on Friday of Chicago White Sox Opening Day by getting as ripped as their wallets would let them.

How much beer wound up being consumed within U.S. Cellular Field? Was it a combination of the white of beer foam and snow, along with the chill of the temperatures of the air and the beer that resulted in some parts of the crowd to start getting all rowdy that day?

Did these guys check out a strip club following the game?

Will at least some of those people wait anxiously for the day this week when the City Council takes up the strip club liquor license issue? Will Mayor Rahm Emanuel feel compelled to get involved – although I can’t help but believe the mayor’s sarcastic praise last week for aldermen being able to find the time to research the strip club issue was somehow right on the mark.

Personally, I’m not going to be impacted by whatever the council chooses to do. I’m not a strip club regular; I can find enough places where I can’t touch the women on the premises without having to pay for the experience. Having a drink isn’t going to make it feel any less tawdry to me!

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EXTRA: Sox or Cubs; which ballclub's fans drink heavier at the ballpark?

You never know where or when a ‘Sox versus Cubs’ debate can break out. Sometimes, it even occurs during a Cook County Board session.

Such was the case on Monday when the finance committee convened for a serious session to review a series of tax increases being considered to balance the county budget for 2012 – ones that county Commissioner William Beavers of the South Side denounced as “poor man’s taxes.”

ONE OF THOSE increases involves a boost in the alcohol beverage tax – the retail sales of beer, wine and assorted spirits. Which invariably will get passed down to the consumer by those who have to pay it.

That includes the people who feel the need to buy a beer (or four) whenever they attend a sports event live.

Which caused county Commissioner Jeff Tobolski of LaGrange to say that he thinks many people will wind up just paying the extra tax without complaint – mo matter how much more in price it makes the cost of a ballpark beer.

“I’m sure it won’t be dry at the stadium,” Tobolski said, adding that he was including, “the Cell (U.S. Cellular Field), Cubs Park (Wrigley Field) and the stadium (Soldier Field)” in his assessment.

APPARENTLY, COUNTY COMMISSIONER Peter Silvestri of the Northwest Side is one of those Cubs fans who has never called his ballclub’s ballpark “Cubs Park.” Because he quickly snapped on Tobolski for excluding the Wrigley Field crowd, whom he implied are much heavier drinkers.

“I’d bet there is more beer sold at Cubs games than at the Sox,” he said. Which sounds like “fightin’ words” to someone like me who is old enough to remember the days when the old Comiskey Park was informally referred to as, “the world’s largest outdoor beer garden.”

All of which caused county Commissioner John Fritchey of the North Side, who considers himself a Cubs fan, to retort, “you know why they sell so much beer at the games. I say that reluctantly.”

It makes sense.

IF I ROOTED for a ballclub where a 100-loss season was always a very real possibility, I’d probably need to imbibe in the alcoholic beverages a tad too much myself.

Then again, there are times when I watch political people at work who manage to make the most basic issues overly-complicated to the point where I feel like I could use a shot or two to recover.

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