N.Y. vs. Chgo – Pizza Wars?

It was earlier this summer that we got a dose of good ol’ fashioned Chicago vs. New York brawling when Mayor Rahm Emanuel dared to suggest that Noo Yawkers could learn a lesson or two about mass transit from our very own elevated train system.

A real pizza cut

 

Now, we’re getting another dose of the alleged Big Apple getting all touchy about the Second City – for someone suggesting that Chicago-area variations on pizza are superior to any of those overly greasy slices you buy in New York and that the locals think it’s a big deal that you fold them in half before eating them.

THE LATEST HISSY fit came about when New York Mayor Bill de Blasio’s press secretary insisted on using his Twitter account to post missives proclaiming the superiority of Chicago takes on pizza – specifically the pepperoni pies served at Pequod’s Pizza.

“This is the best pizza in the United States and it’s not close,” the press secretary said this weekend.

Now personally, I’ve never had pizza from Pequod’s. I don’t have a clue whether it’s any good. This may be an instance of a press flack telling the truth (or exaggerating its merits).

The latter being something that political press people often have to do.

BUT THE NEW York Post – the newspaper that once famously felt the need to report that Donald Trump gave his mistress “the best sex (she) ever had – got itself all up-in-arms about this claim, saying of Pequod’s that it was “an amorphous pile of pepperoni and sauce that is purportedly a pie.”

 

1932 may have had a historic baseball moment ...

So now, Chicago and New York and quibble over where one finds the best pizza.

My own opinion is that the concepts of stuffed pizza or deep dish pizza (which aren’t technically the same thing, even though many people erroneously believe they are) are a completely different dish from various types of thin-crust pizza.

Trying to compare them and say which is best is like trying to compare a plate of lasagna with corned beef and cabbage. Differing concepts altogether.

A ‘PAN’ PIZZA is a meal. Yes, you eat it with a knife and fork (only uncivilized types would think otherwise). Thin-crust is junk food. It can be a snack. But thinking of it as a meal is like someone thinking they’re getting significant nutritional value from McDonald’s.

...but 1917 had better Chicago outcome

It just ain’t so.

Now if we want to compare differing types of thin pizza, that’s a whole ‘nuther issue. Although when it comes to comparing thin-crust pizza, the real question is whether it should be cut into triangular slices, or the so-called “party style” cut of squares that supposedly is a Chicago creation from its origins as bar food you eat while the tavern owner sells you as many over-priced beers or other alcoholic beverages as he can before your wallet is cleared out of cash.

On that ground, I argue for the squares.

IT’S JUST SO much easier to handle, and I’ll admit to always finding it somewhat amusing to get one of those dinky corner pieces that is all crust. I usually snatch one up before getting into the more substantive pieces.

And yes, it is a total violation of pizza-eating etiquette to be one of those piggish people who refuses to take any slices with crust and eat up all the middle pieces with toppings.

Is the fold really more appetizing?

Those people who insist on triangular slices and claim there’s a knack to folding your slice properly to avoid it turning into a dripping mess strike me as people more interested in playing with their food, than eating it! For that reason alone, we ought to claim Chicago superiority when it comes to pizza.

Although I have to admit one bit of hesitation to supporting de Blasio’s press secretary on this issue – he’s a Wisconsin native and a Green Bay Packers fan. Which means he took pleasure in their beating the Bears this weekend. Could this be an effort by an adopted New Yorker to sabotage the Chicago image from within?

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El vs. subway, rather than Sox vs. Yanks. What next? Pizza wars!

The New York Yankees made their annual trip to Chicago’s South Side last week, where they wound up splitting their four-game series against the White Sox. When combined with the two of three games the Yankees won earlier this season in New York, it makes for a 3-4 record the White Sox have for 2017.
 

Rahm smirk sell more papers than Christie carcass?

Not exactly an overpowering by the Bronx Bombers over our Sout’ Side Hit Men.

SO PERHAPS THAT was a factor that caused Noo Yawk types to get all worked up this week in their desire to take pot shots at Chicago; specifically, Mayor Rahm Emanuel and the mass transit system we affectionately refer to as the “el.”

For it seems that on Monday, the New York Times published a commentary written by our mayor that took the attitude there were things that mass transit officials in New York could learn from Chicago.

It ran under the headline, In Chicago, the Trains Actually Run on Time and offered up a statistic that claimed 85 percent of us are satisfied with the way our trains and buses operate. Keep your Mussolini gag to yourself; Chicago trains and buses are fairly reliable and that is important for a mayor.

It also had Rahm saying the reason Chicago’s system isn’t confronted with the problems New York faces (Gov. Andrew Cuomo last week declared a state of emergency for the Metropolitan Transportation Authority) is because our officials emphasize “reliability ahead of expansion.”

IMPLYING THAT NEW York, which has the largest mass transit system in the nation (Chicago is second) has grown wild and out-of-control.

Yanks didn't administer Chgo beat-down, so other issues must occur

Of course, there were those greatly offended that a rube from outside of New York (actually, outside of Manhattan) would dare to know better about anything, That provoked the New York Daily News on Tuesday (a.k.a., Independence Day) to put Rahm on the front page of the paper.

A quarter century later, and CTA still going strong

The Daily News could have gone with front page photos of New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie’s carcass sitting on a lawn chair on the public beach he had ordered closed to the public. But they thought Emanuel would sell more papers, running under the headline Dumb Track Mind and also reminding people, “AT LEAST our riders don’t get SHOT on the way home!”

Which means if there’s really a sense of cosmic justice or bad karma, there will be a shooting incident on board a subway car somewhere in the Bronx.

NOT THAT I’M hoping for such an incident. But for a newspaper that contends its provocative front page layouts are intended to sell papers for people who make an impulse purchase while walking by a newsstand or news box, I just can’t see where Rahm’s goofy smirk really does much to inspire New York news interest.

Besides, for all the things that people can complain about Chicago, one has to admit that our mass transit system does work fairly well – particularly when one considers how old it is.

Some 125 years, with parts of it dating back a century. The basic concept in moving large numbers of people around various parts of Chicago isn’t that radically different than the days when Al Capone was a living, breathing human being in these parts.

It also is one of the things I miss about life in the city proper, and why on those occasions when I return to Chicago proper I make a point of relying upon mass transit to move about.

ANYBODY WHO SERIOUSLY pays $35-40 to park their car for an hour or so in downtown Chicago is a fool. Our mass transit is one of the things our beloved Second City is doing right!

For what it’s worth, my guess is that this outburst (which Emanuel himself is managing to laugh off) is just the usual New York vs. Chicago rivalry; a holdover from when they really were the two largest cities in the country and where Chicago maintains a significance regardless of how much larger Los Angeles may ever become.

A hefty meal, and not junk food

Perhaps if the Yankees could have swept the four-game series against the White Sox, the need to dump on Chicago over mass transit might have been reduced.

Then again, we’ll always have pizza to quarrel over – particularly with those individuals who seriously look at those flimsy slices sold in Brooklyn and can’t see the superiority of something from Uno’s or Lou Malnati’s.

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EDITOR’S NOTE: As for the Daily News claim that Chicago is the "murder capital," these days St. Louis has the highest homicide rate in the nation, with some 60.37 slayings per 100,000 people compared to 18.6 for Chicago (and 7 for New York).