Tuesday, October 2, 2012

EXTRA: County quips. Or, 'Battle of the Board?' Political humor at work

The Cook County Board on Tuesday felt like a comedy club of sorts (perhaps a really dorky one).
GAINER: A movie buff?

For while the lengthy session included its share of acrimonious debate, there also was more than its share of commissioners trying to show off their humor with attempts at pithy quips.

SO MUCH SO that I can’t decide who is worthy of “Quip of the Day” honors. Perhaps it is something that you should decide, after reading what passes for our politicians trying to tell a joke.

Take Commissioner Bridget Gainer, who listened to debate over a measure requiring contractors doing business with county government to report any malfeasance they encounter on the job.

When told the only way to truly get rid of corruption would be to create a separate law enforcement agency devoted to policing government officials.

To which Gainer said, “I’m fighting back the urge to say, ‘we don’t need no stinkin’ badges’.” Somebody’s seen The Treasure of the Sierra Madre just a few times too many.

BUTLER: All knowing?
THEN, THERE WAS debate on a measure creating an advisory committee for the county’s Juvenile Detention Center. Commissioner Jerry Butler doesn’t like the idea, which put him in the minority of the county board.

Which doesn’t surprise “the Iceman,” who said, “I’m used to losing around here because I come from a strange place. A place called ‘common sense’.”

That remark irked Commissioner John Daley, who said, “I think common sense does prevail here” in the county board. You decide which one is more in touch with reality.
GORMAN: A diagnosis?

The county board also approved a resolution praising the 50th wedding anniversary of a couple who happens to be Commissioner Jeffrey Tobolski’s in-laws.

THE RESOLUTION INCLUDED a reference about how they watch their son-in-law on cable access television.

Which caused Commissioner Elizabeth Doody Gorman to say, “those poor people, after 50 years, they must have insomnia.”

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